Pick Your Battles

I, like most people (I think), tend to believe I'm always right. Actually, that's not necessarily true. I'm pretty good at knowing when I'm right, and admitting when I'm wrong. I do however, think that my way of doing things is probably always the best way. This is the real root of most of my problems. I'm probably more efficient and organized than some people, but that doesn't always mean I'm "right". Needless to say, I don't always have this perspective when I am watching other people go about their way. I am a type A - OCD personality. I just am. Blessing or curse, God made me this way.

Tonight, as I sat in a beautiful home in beautiful Hawaii, I quickly became agitated at the inefficient, chaotic way my dad began to organize dinner. When I cook dinner, I like to time everything to come off oven/grill/stove precisely at the exact time that everything can be served hot. Does it always work out? No. Usually? Yes. This is a skill of the hyper-organized person. My dad's method was not lining up quite as well.

Friendly reminder: I am an only child, and a daddy's girl. It's truly a deadly combination. (Sorry, Tony - you have your work cut out for you.)

Rather than taking over and orchestrating the grill and oven in perfect symphony as is my natural tendency to do, I asked if there was anything I could do to help. Sounds like a nice, non-bulldozing solution. I failed. My assigned task was not going to lead to my desired outcome. Like a child, I rolled my eyes, completed my task, and retreated to my room until dinner was completed so I wouldn't have to watch potential chaos ensue. Does chaos actually happen when I'm not in control of dinner? Generally NOT.

I called my sweet Tony to vent. Not only does he empathize with a controlling only child, he loves me so he'll listen and set me straight much more gently than my mother or any other bystander.

Set me straight he did.... The lesson of the night is gained only by having perspective (or a sweet Tony of your own). My instructions? Pick your battles. "Babe, you are in Hawaii, with a family that loves you. Of course things are going to happen.. You need to just pick your battles."

And how right he is... again.

Thinking that I know the best way to do something generally leads me into multiple battles to win the war of dinner, packing, planning, etc. Why should I spend so much time fighting these battles to get my way? It's unnecessary and harmful to the relationships I value so much.

I will never be able to control every situation or fix everything I see as a potential problem or ineffective way of doing something. And in all honesty, that's probably for the better. However, some things will be worth fighting for. For these I will fight. Thanks to simple words of wisdom from the right mouth at the right time, I will simply pick my battles. With that perspective, a grilled fish dinner in Hawaii looks noting like a battlefield to me.